Honesty

First, please go checkout my art takeover at Frothy Monkey in 12 South if you want! I am excited to announce that my work is going to be visible in more spots around Nashville…and not on canvas or paper or mylar in frames, but on walls, crosswalks, and some more surprises! Mural plans are in the works and I owe it all to my friends at Native magazine and my new friends at Nashville Walls Project and Tinney Contemporary as they’ve helped guide me into finding some street art opportunities and have given me some valuable advice. Beau Stanton was in Nashville over the last couple of weeks, painting an incredible mural on 5th Ave and I highly recommend going over there to see it. His process is pretty amazing. It’s been a lifelong dream of mine to paint on walls, having done so without being asked many a time as a child. Working large scale is always my favorite way to paint. I got to learn from the best two weeks ago, getting some great pro tips from Beau Stanton himself, and I am so grateful to be in a city that has one of the most incredible collections of street art, and to be surrounded by truly inspiring work and artists.

I’d like to discuss what defines a “truly inspiring artist" to me. A reader (I was really excited to have a reader p.s.) reached out to me a couple of weeks ago worried about bothering people by asking for advice or mentorship. This hit home because I often feel the same way about approaching literally anyone #socialanxiety and I reminded her that flattering someone by seeking out advice from them is never annoying, and if it is, then you don’t want advice from an arrogant person anyways. I kept thinking about this, though. If I am confident about my work and what I am doing, then this fear I have really shouldn’t exist. I always have trouble approaching artists or gallery owners, etc. and a lot of it is out of respect, awkwardness, fear of being annoying, social anxiety, etc., but I think another reason behind that is a lack of true confidence in my work and what I am doing. Maybe I shouldn’t share this, but it’s all in the spirit of HONESTY! This feeling has been incredibly paralyzing, hence the extremely delayed blog post and serious artist block, but I am going to work through it and explain how! (bare with me)

Right now, Joel Daniel Phillips’ newest work is up at Tinney and not only is it some of the most thoughtful and engaging work I’ve seen, but hearing him talk about this series and conveying a message that is so universally relatable, made me want to take a step back and think about what I am really trying to achieve with my work. To summarize, his exhibit entitled Welcome to the Orange West is a collection of photorealistic graphite and charcoal drawings of abandoned, decaying signs along Route 66, oil rigs, and historical depictions of Westward expansion and the effects it had on the land and its inhabitants. Our romanticized and nostalgic emotions toward this part of our shared history is convoluted, to say the least, and this work forces us to question the cost of our actions or “the sociological factors surrounding Manifest Destiny.” It explores layered histories, classism, environmental and emotional damage that took place, and still take place, to get to where we are today.

So, not only is the work incredibly skillful to a point of actual mastery of graphite drawing, the message is clear, the themes are relevant, thought provoking, and relatable, but the artist is also incredibly articulate and knowledgable on every aspect of this work, ready to literally answer any question that may come his way regarding what this work means to him and to all of us. The amount of research and work that took place before he even picked up a pencil is evident, and on top of that, some of these pieces took upwards of 340 hours to complete. It all speaks very personally to him as well, documenting his move to Tulsa, OK and familial connections to Westward expansion, evoking an emotional response from the artist and viewers. Basically, this is my goal as an artist and what defines an inspiring artist to me. These were all the essential skills we learned as art majors that we needed to master if we wanted to succeed; work must be skillful, thoughtful, personal yet evoke an emotional response in others, it must be well-researched, clear, and artists should be knowledgeable, invested, and articulate about their work. I think recently I have gotten a little swept up in the commercial side of it all. With so much constant competition, mostly pressures I put on myself, to “post a new piece everyday”, “get more followers”, “apply for more shows”, “make more money” it’s hard to produce truly thoughtful work. While there is definitely value in practicing, and “painting what you want” and just painting to paint, taking time to research and finding some true inspiration in something personal is critical. 

I highly recommend going to visit Sewanee right now! All the leaves are changing and it's so pretty!

I recently went up to Sewanee and ran into my favorite professor, who I always seem to run into him when I need direction the most. He reminded me to not lose sight. We discussed my work and my plans, but I think saying out loud that I need to think more critically about what it is exactly that I am doing, was euphoric. I needed a push and a reminder of what I love about what I do. I read a post by an artist recently, and I can’t remember whose it was, but she said “I am so grateful that there are people that connect to my work, even when I don’t”. We can all relate to that, but we shouldn’t. If there’s one thing I want to be fully connected to, it’s my work. I think everyone wants that.

Thanks for reading!

Making Your Own Deadlines

If you are diving headfirst into your work, then some part of your life gets put on the back burner. In my case, it's my social life (and, ya know, making tons of money). No surprise there for anyone who knows me. Case in point, it's an absolutely gorgeous Saturday in Nashville and I am sitting outside my condo with my dog typing this, but here's the thing: I am doing exactly what I want to be doing at this moment. A really quick life question I have for you before I start talking about why deadlines are EXTREMELY important for any person trying to be their own boss is this: What makes you happiest? What do you do everyday? Realistically, how can these two lists become one? That right there is what I think success is. Just having those 2 lists be the exact same thing. What does this have to do with making deadlines? Well, top of my list is creating and sharing what I create. It's what I believe my "purpose" to be, it's my dream, it's what I wake up and go to sleep thinking about. Therefore, to make this dream become my everyday reality, I need to prioritize, I need to be able to support myself with it, and I need to fully commit to it. If you are in the same boat here's something really valuable I have learned and I hope it's helpful to anyone who's on the same path right now and feeling overwhelmed.

To stay productive, it's important to have something extremely specific to work towards. Not "make more money this month" or "paint more" or "work on my website this week", but goals like "compile a new collection of at least 4 pieces by May 15th and be prepared to give an artist talk" or "apply to 7 group art shows by 5 pm tomorrow" or "upload my latest collection to my website by Friday". The more specific and set you can be with the date AND time, the better, or else you just won't adhere to these deadlines at all. Daily To-Do lists are really helpful with this (I love making hand-written lists every morning) as are calendar reminders and Google calendar, if you want to structure and plan out your whole day. It will keep you on track especially if you are like me and get ADD working from home when there are a million household chores staring at you in the face, your dog is pawing at you, and Netflix exists. In the words of Christene Barberich, Editor in Chief of Refinery29 “I don’t think you can truly know what you’re made of until you are in charge of your days. How you use that time, and the work you pursue, teaches you so much about who you are and what you can become”. I make at least 5 big deadlines per month and countless, small daily tasks to meet those deadlines. I put in a lot of hours, at least double my previous full-time job hours, but if you are doing what you love it's not work and there is no better way to spend your time. 

This is a pretty simple concept and I take no credit in it. Our teachers and bosses have been scaring us with deadlines since the beginning of time. When your paycheck or grade or reputation was on the line, it was pretty easy to have the work done, and it shouldn't be any different when you are beginning your life as an entrepreneur, because guess what, those things are still on the line, just in a different way. Respect yourself and the tasks you’ve set for yourself just as you would for your employer. If the day is ending and I still haven’t met my deadline, I work overtime and say no to a lot of things that come up because getting this work done was my priority. Being your own dream employee is just as important as being your own boss. 

The final point that I have about making your own deadlines is this: don’t be too attached to the results of your efforts, only worry about the process. Once you’ve met your deadline, say goodbye to that project and start on the next one. If your deadline involved applying to a showcase, sharing your work, gaining experience, or practicing your craft and you gave it your all and finished what you needed to get done on time, then you succeeded. Serious productivity always results in something positive. You create what failure is in your head by telling yourself what results you expect to come from your hard work. For example, I hope reading this wasn't a huge waste of your time, but my goal for this blog is just to share my experience and what I am learning as I become my own boss, and have it posted by Monday, May 15th at 11:00 a.m., so even if you hated reading it, and I am so sorry if you did, I achieved what I set out to achieve. It sounds really cheesy, but once I stopped asking myself “what if this doesn’t work?” I became more productive than I have ever been. 

These few points have all really helped me especially during weeks when I didn’t have many commissions or freelance work and felt a little directionless. I would panic about not making enough money that week or wonder if all of my efforts were wasted and felt really overwhelmed. All I needed to do was fill my days with small, realistic, achievable goals and that stress just went away. It’s definitely hard going out on  your own, but I have to always remind myself “this was my choice (which I realize is a luxury) this is what I love and what makes me happiest, feeling scared and worrying is silly and I don't have time for it today anyways I've got too much to do”.

Good Timing: The Myth

Last August I left my full-time job in marketing. I didn't know if I was totally ready or if I'd be able to support myself with just art and freelance graphic design, but I convinced myself it would all work out because what I wanted more than anything is to be my own boss and be a full-time artist, and needed to start making a serious effort to reach that goal. I sat down with my financial advisor (my dad) and we came up with a new budget and a plan.  

Here is a corny lesson I've learned and one we've all heard: there is never a perfect time to pursue your dream. It's now or never is what I had to tell myself, because life is short, we are all going to die, and no one should wake up on Monday mornings miserable about the coming week. To convince myself I was doing the right thing I attended some creative seminars led by local business founders, read #GIRLBOSS, read tons of female entrepreneurial blogs, sat down with other Nashville artists, and researched successful, young artists around the country. Here's something they all have in common, none of them claimed that it was the "right time" to venture out on their own. Prior to doing this I was always so envious of these people. I came up with a million excuses why I couldn't create my own career path just like they did: "but I have a mortgage, but I have a lot of bills, but I need health insurance, but I have a hypochondriacal dog who racks up an absurd amount of vet bills, but a girl's gotta eat", and the worst one, "but success is measured by your income". Nope. The Book of Joy helped me destroy that terrible theory (READ IT, it's so awesome). I had to completely stop comparing what I was making to what others' were making. I had to stop comparing myself to other people altogether. This is really hard to do today, and I blame social media. Instagram, is literally a platform to make you jealous of other peoples' talents and lives. (I ain't gonna get rid of my insta though, I need that for business.)

Anyways, once I stopped doing that, and stopped worrying if I was wasting my time or doing the wrong thing and channeling that into "I need to do what I love every day and fully believe in what I am doing if I ever want anyone else to believe in what I'm doing too", things started coming together and my financial stress went away. I stopped trying to justify myself to people who looked concerned or started giving me job ideas when I told them what I did for a living, as if what I do isn't actually a job. I left a full-time job for which I was not right, that asked me to work on my weaknesses everyday, instead of playing to my strengths, which is why I was unhappy, and I decided to do what made me happy. 

I am in no way bragging or pretending to have anything figured out. I don't want to preach to anyone either, but from a millennial who has some financial responsibilities (granted, not a lot- it's not like I have a family to support), not a ton of career experience, wasn't happy with their own job or feeling "fulfilled", with a dream to be my own boss, I just wanted to share with anyone who might be in my same boat what I've learned thus far.  (The following blogs are coming soon)

2. Making Your Own Deadlines
3. Keeping An Open Mind
4. Play To Your Strengths
5. Stay On Track
6. What to Do When You Are Out of Ideas
7. The Power of Pretending
8. Handling Insecurities & Self Doubt